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I had imagined thousands of times what my birth would be like, what it would be like to see the faces of my twins, I wanted to feel that crazy and instinctive love that they said was felt just after giving birth, however all these things happened but not in the way I expected.
Be a mother it is probably one of the best experiences you are going to feel in your life. However, not everything happens in the same way that they have told you. Each woman lives this experience in a different way and it is not always as you have imagined.
We tell you some things that surely no one has told you after delivery.
1- Not all women cry during childbirth. I had seen in dozens of videos, and from what other mothers had told me, how new mothers cried with emotion as soon as they gave birth. I had imagined a thousand times experiencing that pleasant sensation, but when the moment came it was not like that.
I was expecting twins and labor was going to be hard, so when the first of the twins was born, I didn't have time to fall in love with her, but rather I had to focus on bringing the second girl I had inside of me into the world. There were no crying, not a stream of love, just practicality, I had to be strong and not relax to keep pushing.
Over time I remember that little face that looked at me at birth with much more feeling than I really experienced at first. Time has erased the suffering from childbirth And it has improved all my memories, but it was not something instantaneous.
2- There was no love at first sight. I loved my daughters before they were born, but it was a blind love. I really thought that my daughters and I would merge into one person as soon as we were born, and yet I realized that you were little people independent of me, whom I did not know at all. I had to get to know them little by little, and what at first was an instinctive love, became the strongest bond I'd never had, but I also needed time for it.
3- You don't always have postpartum depression. I waited to sink into the mud, especially when there were two of them crying every night, and they sued me every five minutes of the day. I was exhausted and sleepless, but I never experienced sadness, just a joy in abundance that my hormones were not able to collapse no matter how much they circulated through my body at a forced march.
4- You will not want to be seen at the hospital. It may be that I am a little sullen, but the truth is that many of my friends agreed with me that, except for the people closest to you, you did not feel like having visitors.
I was sore after delivery, I couldn't sit up because of the stitches, I had a swollen belly, constipation (which made me very uncomfortable), I wanted to sleep and rest, I had a bad face and a horrible look, and I wanted to be alone with my partner and my daughters, so the least I wanted was to be a good hostess.
5- I hated the advice of my relatives. Everyone had an opinion on the care I should give the babies, even my father gave me advice on how to breastfeed. My distant aunts, whom I saw only at Christmas, would grab the girls to calm them down rocking them as if they hula-hula danced at a frenetic pace, and my sister-in-law showed me that babies do not break if you lift them by one leg to change their diapers. The room was full of good intentions and very little empathy.
6- Do not listen to people who talk to you about your physical appearance. You just took a melon out of the opening of a lemon and do they really expect you to have the face of those photoshopped models from the magazines?
Take a break and relax. You will most likely leave the hospital with the maternity clothes With which you have entered, and that your gut does not return to its being until many months have passed, you will have a swollen face and signs of fatigue, and be prepared to spend the first three years of the baby's life with vomit and snot stained clothes.
Despite all these things, enjoy the moment thoroughly, and live it with positivity, it is one of the most beautiful memories you will have throughout your life.
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