Risks of spoiling children too much

Risks of spoiling children too much

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In most cases we spoil the child without realizing the consequences that this has for the children, in the short and long term.

In many moments we consent to what we consider unimportant things, and that we sometimes justify to avoid a tantrum and maintain peace at home. An example, we make a snack for our son, but he does not like what I have prepared for him, so in order for him to have a snack and avoid a tantrum, I give him something else. We explain the dangers of spoiling your children too much.

- They do not learn to handle and tolerate frustration. When we say no to the child, it is normal for him to get frustrated, and to make that displeasure evident by getting angry or crying. The important thing is that these experiences help you learn to manage these emotions. Children show their displeasure through tantrums and try to achieve their goals, so if we give in at that moment and give them what they ask for, we will have taught them several things. The first to get what they want through screaming and crying, (which in the future may be more aggressive behaviors), and on the other hand we teach them that we are not firm and that they are the ones who dominate situations, so each whenever they want something they will resort to tantrum

- We do not teach them the value of things and to strive to achieve them. If we always give them what they ask for, where is the value of the effort to get things? It does not exist directly, and in the future, when on their way they find that to get things they have to make an effort they will be tremendously unhappy, on the one hand, because they cannot have what they want, and secondly because they will not know how to handle those emotions and they will sad and even depressed. Therefore, you have to teach the value of effort from a young age. If you want us to buy you a pack of stickers, you will have to work hard to get it (just like mom and dad work hard to earn money to buy stickers).

- Having everything and having it can already generate anxiety. Children who have everything when they ask for it do not learn to wait. And when the object of desire lingers, anger and tantrum follow. They want it all and they want it now, and if they don't have it, they get nervous, cry and kick until they get it. On the other hand, if we teach them to have everything they want, when they cannot get something it will generate discomfort and anxiety.

Some of the reasons that parents who come to our consultation give us are, on the one hand, lack of time and on the other, the feeling of guilt.

Lack of time with children is what often leads us to give them everything they ask of us. Some parents have the feeling of not spending enough time with their children, of not doing it well, and to compensate for these situations, and in many cases alleviate guilt, we give in to what they ask of us, we do not say no, and we do not we frustrate. It may also be that when we get home after work, we don't feel like "fighting" with the children, and to avoid a tantrum, we give in to their wishes.

We have to bear in mind that the first years of children's learning are fundamental and that we are educating children who will be adults in the future. We must be aware that if as a child I do not teach them to handle certain situations, as adults they will not know, they will not have tools and then they will be unhappy. If since childhood we give him everything he asks for, when he is older and does not have everything he wants, how will he feel?

When we educate our children we have to project into the future, how do we want them to be? Perhaps it is better that they "suffer" a little when they are small, and that learn with our help to handle these situations, to suffer from old age and lack resources.

You can read more articles similar to Risks of spoiling children too much, in the category of Conduct on site.

Video: Most Spoiled Kids Compilation #3 (July 2022).


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  3. Gardasar

    I understand this question. It can be discussed.

  4. Gardall

    At me a similar situation.Is ready to help.

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